Here We Go Again… Epiphany Time!

Multiple epiphanies to discuss. They come in story format, so bare with me. First off, I made two changes to my health habits: more sleep, and eating a bit healthier. For a couple of days I cut out any ‘added’ sugar (basically no processed food), and for breakfast I had yogurt with fruit, a smidge of apple cider vinegar (yuck) and a teaspoon of coconut oil. After that, I wasn’t hungry for hours! I felt full, and energetic. It’s a fantastic breakfast for me. The combination of eating healthy and getting enough sleep work GREAT for me! I felt so much more attentive throughout the day. I even noticed my vision was sharper and I was able to visually focus a lot easier.  This weekend was the horse show… And I gave in to the rice crispy treat temptation so I cheated a bit. Oddly enough, I did feel the affect of the sugar and I didn’t enjoy the feeling throughout my body. I could even feel the pulse throughout my limbs differently. Too bizarre for me, back to eating healthy! Although, the affects weren’t nearly as bad as when I would deprive myself of sleep and then eat that way. The sleep helped offset the sugar/energy level so I didn’t feel nearly as drained after eating that way.

I felt good yesterday after the horse show, I decided I should sit down to read my Conditioning Sport Horses book by Hilary Clayton.  I opened the book up but I just wasn’t feeling in the mood to read. This thought kind of caught me off guard… This is stuff that fascinates me, and I really want to learn more but something was missing. So I decided to dive into this thought. What would I rather do RIGHT NOW? I asked myself… Well, I had wanted to watch the movie called The Shift (by Dr. Dyer) a second time… So, I looked it up and watched it. And I’m sure glad I did! If you haven’t seen it… Stop everything you’re doing and watch it right now. And watch it. You can choose to watch it ‘online’. It’s $5 and worth every penny, and then some! He’s got such an open mindset and is all about connecting with your authentic self.

Through the entire trip I’ve been a bit quiet down here, acting more as an observer. I had been trying to understand why people do the things they do… On the way to the horse show, my trainer was talking a bit about her up bringing and the way she acted as a child. After telling a story that I could TOTALLY see a mini version of her doing, she mentioned something along the lines of… “It’s funny how our character develops as children.” … Well, that statement popped right back into my mind after watching this movie. I’ve always been in tune with people’s emotions toward things. If I sensed someone was down or upset, I would try to cheer them up. I’ve always tried to make people laugh. I remember watching a family video and boy, was I goofy! I would frequently go out of the way to make people laugh or smile and I found great joy if I was successful in that.

At the horse show, I was watching people pick up their ribbons from the office and I could tell some of the riders weren’t very pleased with their scores or placings. I remember having a negative attitude toward the judges decision from my early, early showing days. My brother was the one who called me out on it. I remember the night we all sat in the kitchen after one of my horse shows… I didn’t get first place, so “the judge didn’t know what he/she was talking about. So, here was little Heather portraying that with an angry arrogant attitude, thinking I was the best and I shouldn’t have lost… My brother, the one who always makes me think, called me out. He’s always been the one who encouraged me to be open-minded. At the time, I didn’t want to even consider the fact that I didn’t win for a reason… Fortunately, over time I developed a better attitude about showing. My goal went from winning, to doing your best and having fun in the process! You win some, and you lose some… You can either accept what happened and look at it in a positive light, or resent and feel negativity inside. I choose positivity!

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I don’t think I wrote about my other epiphany from a few weeks ago, but in order to help accept different training styles I thought about people’s roles in the world. Some people are drill sergeants, and some people are therapists. It’s their personalities, the way they were raised, or any other factor that contributed to the way they view the world and treat other people. Horse trainers are the same way. Some care more about the mental state, some care more about the physical state. Each one is right in it’s own way. Some people thrive from a having drill sergeant, and some thrive from having a therapist. Same with horses.

OKAY, this is where everything comes together…Maybe… This morning I woke up bright eyed, bushy tailed and ready to do the barn chores. I felt sharp and quick. I was very efficient working that way.  Cleaning stalls after I feed and turn out horses is a wonderful opportunity to listen to music, and think. Combining the thought of: character forming from childhood, understanding why people act the way they do from their history, assessing emotions, striving for positivity, finding gratitude out of helping others view things more positively, trying to weave wellness, exercise, and horses together, and the thought “some people are drill sergeants, and some are therapists”… BINGO! I like to help people, and I like to help horses. I always put mental aspect above physical. If you don’t have POSITIVE access to the brain, you’re not going to have access to a soft, supple, relaxed and willing body. But at the same time, improving the physiological aspect of the body improves overall wellness, too. So, where do I go from here? I can’t help but day dream, I understand planning too far ahead is silly when it gets to the point of worry and uncertainty, but it doesn’t hurt to dream. I was thinking of having a program for conditioning the horse and rider physically to create a better team. But most of the things I like to think about begin with the psychology. How can I make the horse understand? How can I make the rider understand? What if the horse had a bad history? How can I regain his or her trust? What if the rider had a bad history? How can I restore their confidence? Will stronger core increase the rider’s stability and therefore increase their confidence?


Nutrition, exercise/fitness, amount of sleep, level of stress, general outlook on life that can have impact on level of stress… It’s all a part of the system and when it comes down to the nitty-gritty, it determines your quality of life! SO… My goal is to learn about improving all of the above. I would absolutely LOVE to open a wellness clinic someday to help improve people’s quality of life. Horses can definitely be used as a resource for that. A little animal therapy always helps! So, there’s my epiphany… No stress, no worries, just leaning and sharing and being in the present!

OH! That leads me to my other epiphany! Being in the now… I called my brother this morning to share my first epiphany, and he helped me find another! We were talking about being in the present, and all of a sudden I had this STRONG urge to get the heck out of there… I wanted to go HOME! I thought, this is not where I want to be right NOW! Get me out of here and take me home! Then my brother said, “Well, assess why you feel this way, then you can do something to change it, leave, or accept where you’re at.” So after I calmed down and actually thought about it… I realized I was being repulsed by a memory from an earlier event that made me want to go home. I wasn’t living in the ‘now’, I was stuck in fantasyland! Anything other than present is fantasy. It’s okay to take a trip down memory lane, or dream about the future, but just be aware that’s where your mind is at.

One thing that helped me get a better grasp on that: live your life like you’re watching a movie of yourself. You are the star of your movie right now. I’m aware of how I appear, how my surrounds appear, how I’m breathing, how I’m moving… And I’m accepting all of it. The same way you watch a movie and accept what’s on the screen, I’m taking it all in. I’m witnessing my own movie as it’s happening. I don’t know how that makes you feel, but it liberates me! Still talking to my brother on the phone during this train of thought, and I said “DANG Nick! This is the best movie ever! It’s so fun! I choose how this character acts, I’m not the boring lazy character, I am the one that is ambitious and hard working!” After that, I blasted through cleaning the stalls with a smile on my face the entire time. When I felt tired, I just thought what I would like to see in my movie…Does Heather give up from a slight lack of energy? Or does she keep going… DUH! She keeps going! This was a fun idea to play around with.

I am absolutely in love with life. Through the good times and the bad, I know everything happens for a reason and I’m going to make the best out of all of it!


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